Marveldo
With DC’s recent run of pulpings, much attention has been placed on previous comics that were recalled and reprinted, including the infamous LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN #5, which was printed and then destroyed because it was discovered to have an ad for something called “Marvel Douche,” complete with a bizarro looking, er, turkey baster, in the back, and it was thought the ad was insulting to Marvel.

Why are we bringing this up? Because a lot of stories we’ve seen about this issue state, falsely, that Marvel Douche was a “made-up ad.” In fact, it was, as artist Kevin O’Neill puts it, a “100% genuine Victorian ad, not altered in any way.”

The Marvel Douche survived into the ’20s, as shown at the rather odd (but informative) website, The Museum of Menstruation, which even includes scans of an entire booklet on feminine hygiene, “The Marvel Way.”

Marvebkh

So before you think that this is all too weird to be true, remember that women are always being encouraged to squirt strange things up their cooters. The Marvel Douche is but one page in a long tradition. Plus, who could possibly resist something called a “whirling spray”?

17 COMMENTS

  1. It’s true. I can’t begin to tell you how many things I’ve seen women encouraged to squirt into their cooters. Mostly by men.

  2. Thank you, Heidi! Once again you have shared a mystery with your male readers. This, along with the Disney filmstrip on “changes”, has helped give me a better understanding of the Female Condition.
    One question… how and where should one properly use the word “cooter”? How offensive is it in comparison with the “clint” word? Are there more acceptable alternatives, such as “woo woo” “misstery” or “antarctica”? Or, like men, do women just give it a casual nickname?

  3. Keep your cooters clean, girls– it’s the Marvel Way!

    (Someone please come rescue me from this giggling pile I seem to have fallen into)

    (OH crap, it’s worse now that I’m imagining Stan Lee saying it D:)

  4. I briefly annotated 19th-century Harper’s Weeklies for an eBay seller (I was young, i needed the money), and this would fit right in with the ads for the Electric Flesh Brush and Darkie Cabbage centerpiece (which is startlingly exactly what you think it is–imagine if Anne Geddes got a hold of yesterday’s featured Dennis the Menace cartoon).

  5. I would like to learn more about its whirling liquid action, and I have sent in my coupon. I am, after all, a Modern Woman who wants to face life frankly and openly — and properly sanitized. But that goes without saying.

  6. Ah, a novel gift for any wedding anniversary.

    “Hey, Honey — look at this!”

    “–whadya mean, ‘I’m so insensitive?'”

  7. “Remember that women are always being encouraged to squirt strange things up their cooters.”

    Heidi, I hold you solely responsible for the Diet Coke that just sprayed out of my nose.

  8. Words are things to be loved and worshiped. Too often we forget some words exist. Thanks, Heidi, for reminding me that cooter (as a word) still exists.

  9. Oh god, Tim’s comment above has just reminded me of an horrific story a friend of mine told me about when he was running a 24 hour supermarket. I won’t go into detail, suffice to say it involved a hooker, the toilets in the store, and a shaken-up 2-litre bottle of diet coke.
    Eeew…

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